Lessons Learned From a 5K Run

As some of you know, I began training in June with the goal of getting into better shape and losing some weight.  A month later I incorporated weight training as well.  I don't know how in the world I finally got the gumption to do this, and then stick with it, but I did - with help from my friend who was my training buddy  My goal was to run 3 miles in under 45 minutes and lose 25 pounds.  For three and 1/2 months I trained.....diligently.  I reached the point where I was clearly seeing muscle definition and feeling increased strength from the weight training and I was able to run 3 miles in just over 45 minutes.  I did not, however, lose a freaking pound.  It nagged at me mentally and emotionally and I had to fight to keep that from discouraging me and I will admit it became harder and harder to find the will to keep going.....but I did.  Then 'life' started happening.

Seven weeks ago Punky began rehearsals for her first major role as Scout in To Kill a Mockingbird.  Counting driving time, our entire evenings, from 6:30 until 11pm or later were taken up with preparing to perform and then performing.  I was no longer able to make it to weigh training class - which is only offered in the evenings and I was exhausted in the mornings and getting up to run was more of a struggle than ever.  I did keep training, working toward running 3 miles in 45 minutes or less, because my training buddy and I had decided to register to run our first 5K marathon - Run of Dye.  I was determined to run and not die.

About four and a half weeks before Marathon day, I did something to my left hip while running.  Whatever it was that I did it hurt like a son of a bitch.  I was already battling some pain from my left knee (I tore the hell out of it in a bicycle collision when I was 15) and swelling and pain in my left ankle, which I had severely sprained Spring of 2012 in a bad fall.  Did I mention that I have fibromyalgia?  Training became more and more of a struggle and I really missed my weight training - which really had helped with the 5K training.  I went from running 3 days a week to 2 days a week and then only here and there.  The day after a run my hip hurt so bad I could barely walk.  Finally one morning while running I 'blew my hip out'.  I say that because that is exactly what it felt like.  That was my "hit the wall' moment because I was never able to run again.  It took several days before I could even power walk and the last time I power walked the pain in my hip didn't disappear until a day before the marathon.    I didn't run again.  At all.  I couldn't.  To tell the truth I wanted to skip the 5K marathon all together.  I was still walking with some pain and a slight limp.

Yesterday was the marathon and I didn't skip it.  I did it.  Not only did I do it, but I actually met my goal.  I finished in 44:57.  That's a 14.37 minutes mile.  That's my best time ever.  While I'm not surprised I finished, I'm a little surprised I finished in my goal time.  Why,  I wondered, was I able to do that?  I hadn't run, or even walked, for weeks.  My hip had only JUST stopped aching every day and I have been so busy with Punky's schedule, having company, and preparing for hubby to get home for his two week R&R that I *never* thought it was even possible to finish within in my goal time.  On top of all that, when we arrived at the marathon we discovered that the terrain we were running on was more like a cross country experience than what I was used to doing - running on pavement/sidewalks.  The area had been mowed down but it was the most uneven terrain - roots sticking up everywhere, slopes and holes, etc.  I had to keep my eyes on the ground to avoid tripping or worse crashing to the ground like the giant in 'Jack and the Beanstalk'.  True story.

So, today I'm still wondering:  How did I do it?  How was it possible?  After some thought I have a few answers and I realize that they don't just apply to my 5K run. 

1)  Set a goal and work to achieve it.  You might fail, you might have to stop and start again, or you might just might succeed.  It's worth the effort to set the goal and work to fulfill it.  Success or failure notwithstanding.  The journey really is the most important part.

2)  Don't do it alone.  Find a buddy who understands you, wants you to succeed, knows when to push and how to push you and when to back off.  Most importantly find a buddy that will truly celebrate your success and support you when you don't.

3)  Realize that what you do today has a ripple effect in your life.  If you work hard for days at a time, weeks at a time, even months at a time and then become derailed remember that all that hard work you did isn't for nothing.  It *does* pay off in the end and maybe in ways you didn't expect.  It becomes a part of who you are and helps you along your path - one way or another.

4)  How you meet your goal may not end up being how you planned to meet your goal.  Putting in your best effort and working toward your goal matters more than following a detailed list of HOW to meet your goal.  Flexibility is necessary because life is always in a state of flux.

5)  There is nothing more rewarding that proving to **yourself** that you can do what you set your mind to do.  Nothing.  All the 'way to go', 'good job', comments from friends and family don't mean as much as being able to carry around that bit of pride and accomplishment in your mind from actually going for it!

So not only did my 5K training journey emphasize these life lessons for me, they are the reasons I succeeded.  I set a goal and worked, as best I could, to achieve it.  I didn't go it alone.  The time I was able to work hard and train paid off for the times I couldn't and still counted.  The last quarter mile of the race, when I wasn't going to finish in time, I wanted to prove to myself I could do it and I ignored the pain in my hip, knee, ankle and chest and pushed it as hard as I could and that last quarter of a mile felt like it would be the death of me in some ways, but I wanted to prove to myself I could do it and the pay off was huge.

Of course, I'm not the inappropriate homeschooler for nothing.  There were a few inappropriate lessons I learned doing the 5K:

-  I am capable of being so LOUD that the emcee of the event could hear me yell, "You suck" over the roar of a VERY large crowd and rock music coming from the speakers.  (In my defense he was throwing out free prizes and was totally ignoring the folks in the back, where my friends and I were.)

- When being chastised by the emcee for yelling out he sucked, I resort to language that wasn't appropriate.  It wasn't language that turned the air really blue - more like robin egg blue.

- I'm brazen enough that when city didn't provide any cops to help direct the crazy traffic into and out of the parking area I am willing to take my hat off and use it to direct cars.

So, that's my 5K training journey.

The most shocking thing of all for me though is the fact that I fully intend to get up in the morning and run.  I'm doing it for me, just for me. 

~Mari B.

P.S. - Can you believe the chick in the flexible picture??

***10/28/13***
P.S.S. - I didn't think it was necessary, but apparently it is.  I KNOW that a 5K is not a marathon.  I know that the proper terminology is 5K, 10K, half marathon and marathon.  I know what the distances are for each as well.  I was being IRONIC.  ;-)  The 5K was my marathon.....you know for me, it felt like a marathon.....see it's not as funny when you have to explain the joke.  ;-)

How Scout Finch Changed Our Lives

The Evolution of Punky

Punky has spent the last 7 weeks in a small town in Alabama called Maycomb County.  She has a father named Atticus and a brother Jem.  She's a tomboy with a keen mind and a bravado that only a 10 year old can have.  She's dealt with folks calling her all sorts of names and screaming at her about how her daddy defends niggers.  She's been attacked and watched her brother's arm get broken by the most bigoted, lying scum in all of Maycomb.  She's dealt with the death of one innocent black man and witnessed the death of another.  She's learned valuable life lessons about courage, empathy, and honesty as well as having the innocence torn away from her childhood by witnessing the horrors man commits against his fellow men.

Punky has brought the role of Scout, in 'To Kill a Mockingbird', to life in a way that has astonished me.  More importantly, the leap she's taken in her own growth and maturity matches her ability to breath life into Scout.  Punky's dedication to her craft and her commitment to the part, her cast mates, and the director rival - in my opinion - an adult who is a veteran of theatre.  Somewhere along this 7 week journey Punky became a young woman.  She's only 12 but she has demonstrated the maturity, responsibility, and ability of a much older girl.  Her composure and demeanor are remarkable for one so young.  She's dealt with a few personal issues along the way and there has been a marked difference in how she would have handled those issues 7 weeks ago to how she did handle them.

It may all just be a coincidence, but I personally believe it is not.  I believe that by allowing Punky to reach for her dream - auditioning for the role of Scout, pursue her true passion - acting, and giving her total ownership of the entire experience she grew up these last 7 weeks more than she would have, and in ways she might not have, if she had not had this experience.  The educational value of this experience is equal to a semester in a college theatre program.  The personal value of this experience is equal to nothing I can think of to make a comparison.  Her hard work and determination have paid off BIG for her.  

The confidence she's gained by working hard to deliver a deeply moving performance and  knowing for certain where her joy lies gives her a focus and understanding for her life that so few of us ever know, let alone learn at so young an age.  That is all so much more than any classroom could give her.

Punky has received numerous compliments and extensive praise from family, friends, and even strangers for her performance.  That is what they all see....

her talent, her abilities, her dedication, her commitment, her acting.  It's all wonderful!  It's what I see though that means so much more than all that.  I see the woman she is becoming and that woman, in my opinion, is Oscar worthy.  How does any of this relate to homeschooling you may wonder?  We owe a debt to homeschooling.  If it were not for homeschooling there would have been no Scout audition and without that all that has been realized and achieved in these last 7 weeks would not have been possible.

We made the choice to homeschool and Punky made the choice to go for her dream.  Life is all about choices, good or bad, right or wrong, our destinies will unfold according to our choices.

~Mari B.

A Lesson Learned from Punky

My beautiful, smart, talented Punky is playing her first lead role, as Scout, in a theatre production of 'To Kill a Mockingbird.'  This is the biggest thing that has happened to her in her short 12 years on this planet.  I'm more excited for this than I ever was for my own performances in high school.  The rehearsal schedule is intense and will only get more so as we inch closer and closer to Opening Night.  The theatre, which is a well respected one that has turned out a few current stars of today, is a 40 minute drive for us.  Rehearsals are every night of the week beginning at 7:30 and ending anywhere from 9:30 to 11pm.  All in all, it makes for a long night for us leaving the house at 6:45 and not returning until 11:30pm.  

Of course we've adjusted our school schedule to accommodate for the rehearsals and soon, the run of the show.  Punky will give 9 performances as Scout.  For those 9 performances she has worked hard to learn all her lines (and there are a lot), know her cues, and develop facial expression and body language for each scene.  She's learning about active listening, being in the moment, and developing a character.  She's also having to learn how to do physical/stunt work as the scene toward the end has her being attacked and in running away from her attacker she trips and falls.  She has to trip and fall 9 times in total during the run of the show and countless other times during rehearsals.  She's already learned to not land on her hands, as she did the first try, and she has the sore wrist to remind her.  She's learned all this without me.  She's learned all this on her own through either the guidance and direction of her fellow cast mates and director or through her own intuition, inherent skill, and talent in acting.

During this time Punky is learning fractions in her math course - adding and subtracting them, multiplying and dividing them, reducing them, finding common denominators, improper fractions and mixed numbers, etc.  For Grammar she has finished her prepositions study and is now on verbs and every thing you can imagine one is to learn about them:  phrases, regular verbs, irregular verbs, direct objects, linking verbs, predicate nominatives and adjectives, etc.  Punky is allowed to choose her reading material each week and do a report.  She developed an interest in slavery, a topic she has previously avoided out of distaste.  It is the story of 'To Kill a Mockingbird' that has sparked her interest in race relations in our country going back to slavery and on through to Civil Right and today's climate.  Currently she is studying the Underground Railroad, Harriet Tubman, Frederick Douglas, and others.  Thanks to her being cast as Scout she's opened herself up to issues that she previously found too difficult to think about or deal with.  By being in the production she is learning, in a deep, personal way, the lessons of the story:  

Respect Others -

"Company gets treated politely no matter who they are" (Calpurnia)

Be Open Minded -

"You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." (Atticus)

Protect the Innocent - 

"The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience."  (Atticus)

Everyone is Equal -

“I think there's just one kind of folks. Folks.” (Scout)

Take a Stand and Do the Right Thing -

When I sit back and reflect on all that she is doing at this time, and how well she is accomplishing it all, I'm reminded once again of what a remarkable young woman she is.  Watching Punky during this process, paying attention to the personal, intellectual, and even physical growth that is occurring during this time I am reminded, once again, of a few important lessons.

Children will face any challenge they need to in order to accomplish a goal they desire to achieve.

Children will complete necessary tasks, in their own way, to accomplish a goal they desire to achieve.

Children will learn whatever is necessary to accomplish a goal they desire to achieve.

Children will excel at their goal when their goal is of their own making, fueled by their own interests and desires.

Punky amazes me by the amount of responsibility, dedication, and maturity she demonstrates every night at the theatre.  She needs no prodding from me at all to learn her lines, know her cues, remember her schedule, develop her character, and honor her commitment to the part of Scout.  It is in these moments that I see, very clearly, the woman she will become.  A woman with a strong work ethic, respect for others, a generous spirit, and a self motivated doer!  I feel blessed to witness this in her at such a young age.  I know she is blessed to have found her passion at such a young age.  Witnessing all this teaches me, yet again, that no matter how she may struggle with math or reading, she is fully capable of setting goals for herself, doing the work, and accomplishing what she sets out to accomplish.  That is a lesson I'm more than happy to learn.

~Mari B.